I have a major question

Let me ask you, do you know how valuable you are? I mean, really. Do you know that you were created to be a princess? You were created to be honored and loved. You are beautiful, created in the image of Christ, and deserving of nothing less than what God intended for you. There is so much power in that! Unfortunately, that is not what the world is telling us. Without standing on my soap box for too long, it angers me to see how our society has cheapened God’s most exquisite creation. Absolutely gorgeous, successful women send messages to our teens that modesty & purity are no longer of value. That is such a lie! Because what they fail to project is the broken heart beneath the beautiful body. You cannot live a life so contrary to God and expect there not to be consequences. Don’t misunderstand me – we all fail at times. I know I certainly have; and it comes with a price. God is always willing to pick us back up, dust us off, and point us in the right direction. He wants nothing less than the very best for you – and that comes from actively seeking Him every single minute of every single day.

Now, you said your boyfriend is not pressuring you but I’m afraid I have to disagree. He may not be giving you an ultimatum, but if he has indicated to you that he is ready to go farther in the relationship than you are willing to, he’s putting pressure on you. Remember that sin rarely slaps us upside the head unannounced; typically it begins very small . . . an inappropriate thought, a subtle touch, words that are hidden in love but have an ulterior motive. Your body is going through some very exciting but confusing changes right now. It is natural to wonder about sex, but you must never forget that God has provided very specific boundaries for reasons that are of benefit to you. I suggest you approach your boyfriend with firmness that sex is not an option for you. Period. Refuse to be alone with him to resist the temptation, go out in groups and take some of the pressure off of both of you. I heard one of the singers from ZoeGirl speak recently and she talked of her choices sexually as a teenager/young adult and how they impacted her life. When she met the man that became her husband, he would not put himself in a situation that left him alone with her. Not because he didn’t want to be alone with her but because he DID want to be with her and he feared that he would not be able to resist the temptation. More important to him than satisfying his own desires was honoring her. Your boyfriend should regard you in the same way, and if he doesn’t, as difficult as it may be to admit, he may not be the man God designed for you. Surround yourself with girlfriends that are taking the same stand. I think it’s safe to say many of your Christian girlfriends have already compromised in this area. Stand firm in knowing that God has more in store for you. When you meet the man who will be your husband, whether it turns out to be your current boyfriend or someone else, don’t you want to be able to give him all of you? Let me suggest a great book written for girls from a guy’s perspective, “The Truth About Guys” by Chad Eastham. He gives answers to some questions you may have based on scripture without being “preachy” – plus he gives some insight on how a guys mind works! (Wish I had that one about 20 years ago!!) Check out his website for more info www.chadeastham.com.

And finally, if you have already crossed into territory you know you shouldn’t be in – remember that God is always faithful to forgive those who ask with a repentant spirit. His love for you has not changed one ounce if you’ve made poor choices. Turn it around – it won’t be easy – but you can do all things through Christ. You deserve not to walk around with the scars of sex outside of God’s will. The price that comes with the short season of fun is way too high. It is my prayer that you will continually make decisions that will honor God so you can experience the fullness of what He has in store for you.